'From A Letter From Lesbia' ... So, praise the gods, Catullus is away! And let me tend you this advice, my dear: Take any lover that you will, or may, Except a poet. All of them are queer. It's just the same -- a quarrel or a kiss Is but a tune to play upon his pipe. He's always hymning that or wailing this; Myself, I much prefer the business type. That thing he wrote, the time the sparrow died -- (Oh, most unpleasant -- gloomy, tedious words!) I called it sweet, and made believe I cried; The stupid fool! I've always hated birds ... -- Dorothy Parker