More Supposedly Real Funny Sentences

[wooga@xxxxxxxxxx (Joel E. Slotkin)]

I found these sentences in a book which claims that they are from
actual newspaper articles:

  o   Great care must be exercised in tying horses to trees, as they
      are apt to bark.

  o   We do not tear your clothing with machinery; we do it carefully
      by hand.

  o   After Governor Baldridge watched the lion perform, he was taken
      to Main Street and fed twenty-five pounds of red meat in front of
      the Fox Theater.

  o   The Duchess handled the launching beautifully, confidently
      smashing the champagne against the prow.  The crowd cheered as
      she majestically slid down the greasy runway into the sea.

  o   Anti-nuclear protestors released live cockroaches inside the
      White House Friday, and these were arrested when they left and
      blocked a security gate.

I worry about these people.  -- Path:  ...decvax!yale!spock!wooga